❀ A Sparkle of Joy

From Anas RA from the Prophet SAW said, "None of you is a person of faith, before he loved his brother as he loves himself."

Saturday, March 30, 01:46


One of the F.A.Qs when people met me, like my tuition teachers or old friends or some random dude from my school is


Actually I never feel that I'm that short even I am the second shortest girl in my class and I am the shortest prefect in 2013. Maybe I lack of self conscious or something like that. And frankly speaking, I like the fact that I'm kinda short. 

People like me always get distracted when finishing something.
I'm so sorry folio.But I'm not a big fan of yours.

Wednesday, February 13, 00:39
Dee Dum Dee Dum


It has been a while since the last time I posted something.like two months !
And I only can touch this keyboard on the weekend and at night(pffft like always) since I'm one of the ... what do you call that, last batch of PMR candidates or something like that? please wake me up. Last batch weh ! It sounds creepy, well to me.

And it's already February. January was perfectly fine and alhamdulillah Allah still give me the chance to live~

Like most of the other typical PMR candidates, my main concern is which school I'm going to study at next year?Should I just stay?or should I move to another school, I mean, to a prestigious school?Well most part of myself want to TRY another school. Maybe any MRSM . As long as the Arabic language is one of the core subjects..No matter where I go, I wont leave that language behind.Ever.

Mum says we're gonna move to somewhere else next year. I wonder if it is really true. Then my desire to just stay at SMK Seksyen 18 HEBAT like , getting dimmer.First because the place we're going to live is way too far from my school.Staying at the hostel? Well, I don't want to stay at that school hostel, and I have my own reasons.

And yeah, I forgot something. You know what we Muslims do when we don't know what to choose when have lemons of choices in something? Of course it is Istikharah. Just ask Allah what to do. The world is wide. MRSMs are not only the best schools in Malaysia.There are lemons of great schools in this country.Don't have to rush.

Well, that's not my only focus now. My main priority right now is to study until I puke for like nine or ten months for PMR. Well, always target for the best. And I always remind myself, if Allah doesn't wills it, it won't happen. So, ask Allah to help you :)
Tuesday, December 18, 00:22
Big-Invisible-Deceiving-and-so-on Liar !

Kau membisik
Kau memanggil
Cuba mengheretku ke ruang fantasi
Bicaramu menggoda
Semua bagai indah
Hanya madah sia-sia, racun berbisa~~~

Gosh, our imaan do have ups and downs ! 

When you fall down, you gotta get up quickly  ! yosh !

I wish, one day, I could be immune from all the shaitans' whispers and all the dunya's deception! 
Stop dreaming Maryam ! Do something already ! 

Saturday, December 15, 00:32
Two Feet to Walk


This evening, I watched a movie with my dad, at the living room of course.We watched a horror movie. It's not that horrific actually.It's just, surprising  and we kept surprised.Eh? grammar nazis
It's the evil version of fairies.Kids always think fairies are cute and stuff, but in this movie, the fairies were surprisingly ugly and they're so evil and mean.

While we watched the climax, the very surprising moment, when it was so dark in that house,suddenly I heard like someone's unlocking the front door of my house. I ask my dad, "Dad, who's there dad?"
My dad said
" it's your brother, right?"
"No, it's not, he's taking a shower."
When the climax part of the movie get more intense, we were looking at the door. We waited for the door to open.The background music getting louder and louder.When the door opened, it was ...
My sister !
 end of story k thanksbye~

 Well, that's not what I really really want to talk about now. Seriously. It often happens. pfft.

Anyway, we were surprised my sister is staying here with her husband and son today. And my nephew's hair getting blacker and longer :)

When we were having dinner, my mum said that my aunt from Sarawak had to go to Kuching from Miri every month to fixed his son's legs.It takes twelve hours driving from Miri from Sarawak ! Her son got the feet disorder, which is club foot disorder, which is,  a common disorder actually especially for newborn babies. And my mum said I had it too when I was born.

My mum said it happened to my both feet and I couldn't imagine hot weird it looked.Ugh
Sometimes, parent's don't notice that their children had the club foot and the best time to prevent it when they are still babies because babies' bones are kinda 'felxible' that adults' bones?
If you don't fix it early, it's going to be tough and your may have to be operated.

So my mum said she went to see the doctor, asking what's wrong with my feet. For your information people,there are many kinds of people in this world. As well as doctors. My mum said she cried when the doctor said my feet needed to be operated and I have to be warded for many many days. My mum just couldn't do it because she said I was too young to be operated, my body was too soft and fragile, luckily the staff nurse saved the day. She said there's another solution.My feet can be fixed by the physiotherapy treatment. And it was easier and I don't have to be operated. My mum said that doctor was so sarcastic.I can't believe there such kind of doctors.

pfft,scary doctors telling scary things

So to future doctors, be a good doctor!

My mum had encountered another doctor with the same altitude when my sister had this kind of eerie illness. It was like she has no bones , her body was like jelly-ing she can't even stand up or even sit down. That's scary enough for my family, and the doctor my mother met told her my sister had something wrong with her brain and her brain need to be operated and all the scary stuff. Operating brain? it's risky.I mean like, seriously. My other sister who now studying medic said the brain is the toughest organ because we can't just cut it into two to look what's inside while operating people.

So my mum met another doctor if there's another way to fixed it, and yes, there's another way ~~
But I don't remember what did the doctor do to my sister, he said it's genetic. My grandfather's brother had that.She really had a tough time back there, she can't go to class, sometimes she can't walk straight but Alhamdulillah, it's the past.

            *                                        *                                                   *

   The thing is, I am very grateful because I have a mother like her. Well, it's because of Him.That made me realized how He loved me because a have a loving mother that can't bear to see her children suffer in pain. 
You know Him, sometimes people call him Hakim or Aziz , or Rahman, or Rahim, or Muhaimin .He has 99 glamor names. We all know his real name~

"And your Lord has decreed that you not worship except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], "uff," and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word."
~Surah Al- Isra: 23

Tuesday, December 11, 00:13
Laa Title, ya sadiqi/sadiqati

Something from my past,maybe not the past,yet.eh?

"We got one life to love eachother
Protecting and be there one another
We're worthless if we keep on fighting
'Cause together we can face the night
If we're ready to love"

Wednesday, December 5, 23:40
Waking Up


     "Malaysians are aware of their flaws but they have no enthusiasm to change that because it will get them out of their comfort zone"

    More or less. I still remember that sentence,well maybe I exaggerated or sumthing .But anyway, that sentence makes me feel like "you're talking about me?" lalalalalaaa

    "Indeed, Allah will not change the condition of a people until they change what is in themselves"
      ~QS 13:11

                                                                  *   *   *

  School holiday is about to end a couple of weeks from now and I'm dying to go to my super duper incredible school ! walaweyh~

       And this holiday I think I have some problem with my biological clock.It makes my head giddy.ugh..
Next year I'll be one of the last PMR candidates.Yup.The last batch.The last batch and there will be no more PMR.So this holiday I have to study and study and study ~ well, it's not easy for people like me to istiqomah.pfft.There's always distractions,always new anime,new movie,new places and stuff.
So I tried and I'm still trying to focus and focus.Well,prayer is our most powerful weapon right,Muslims? Some people may say I'm pushing myself too hard but I need to keep my brain to be functional and keep filling it with lemons of stuff !

 One thing I'm worried about is, getting bored. Somehow.
We feel bored maybe because there's nothing interesting or nothing to do.Like, nothing. But the truth at the moment,I still have lots of things to think, lots of things to do and yet, I still have the time to feel BORED.Come on lah, how can you still feel BORED while our sisters and brothers in Palestine and Syria are still struggling for their lives?how can you still feel BORED when lots of people out there losing the Light?how can you still feel BORED when PMR is getting closer and closer and you can even hear the creepy call?

Feeling bored makes me think I'm lifeless.Lifeless here means I care nothing but myself, I have nothing to achieve, I have no .. function,maybe? fuh

Well, that's what I think~

"And I did not create the jinn and mankind except to worship Me"
~Surah Ad-Dhariyat,51:56

Sunday, November 18, 22:39





random kbye